c'est la vie

“The company feels that there are great growth opportunities for it in the Cape” says hubby whilst we are sitting on the stoep of our chalet in Sondela Lodge about 9 months ago.  “They want me to go and start up the business from scratch and then be the boss of it”. I look at him.  “Permanently?”, I ask.  Because surely that is not what he means.  Already all the implications of that have run through my mind at the speed of light. “That is the idea - it is a fantastic opportunity and you know how I love the Cape”, says aforementioned husband. Yes, I think.  I also love the Cape and every time I used to visit Jess here before she came back to Pretoria, I would, I admit, think how lovely it would be to live here.  But that does not mean that I thought about it so seriously that I was going to up and move my 53 year life from Pretoria to the Cape. I burst into tears.  “That is exactly the reaction I told my boss I was going to get”, says he. I i...

Anxiety Anxiety attacks Panic Panic attacks We read about them. We see programmes in which people suffer from it. In all probability you have a friend / family member who suffers from it. In all probability you have a friend / family member who suffers from it and you are not aware of that. In some cases you may have a friend / family member who suffers from it and you think they are overreacting / over dramatizing / looking for attention / pretending or as one former ”friend” of mine told me - you bring it on yourself. Clearly a fool. If you have not felt the physical effects of a pending attack, if you have not suffered the horrendous feeling when the attack grabs you and if you have no interest or sympathy in this growing phenomenon in society, then this would be a good place for you to stop reading. I suffered from panic attacks as far back as 30 years ago. It never had a name, it was never diagnosed - it was a dark hole that gripped me without warning on a re...

2019 is a big year for me.  For the first time in probably 30 years I am not in a fixed Monday to Friday job.  This is huge.  I return from leave tomorrow and on Monday it will be a very weird feeling to not have my alarm go off and then get up and drive off to a place and slide in behind my desk.  I am sitting on the balcony right now, writing this as the waves crash onto the beach, just a short distance in front of me.  I am trying to think when last I never had a desk to arrive at.  I can’t .... it is thousands of days ago.   It gave me an opportunity to look back at the many desks I have sat at - 6 years at a big Catholic Parish as the Parish Secretary, 3 years at Irene Homes for Mentally Disabled Adults, where I was the Corporate Fundraiser (what a completely different world ... heels every day and negotiations with donors for amounts in excess of R500 000 each time), 3 years before that working for all the Embassies in Pretoria as the liaiso...

The beach.  The beach is a place of great entertainment.   And the beach has a people culture, just like a 5 day cricket Test, which is the subject of another blog.  So in order to form a clear picture for you, I am blending together various people experienced over the past 4 days on the beach.  1.  The Big Talking, Small Costume Alpha Male and Family Group - You know when they arrive on the beach.  Because he all but makes an announcement.  Setting up their area is loud.  He is instructing his wife, his kids, his mother and anyone else around them.  Loudly. He can be recognized by some of the following phrases - “Ja I told Person A that Umhlanga is the place to be, the okes here all have money, cos you gotta have money to be down here boet” and  “xxx put that towel further away from us we don’t want sand on us” and “I must just remember to call the bank and ask them to check the balance on my investment”, “xxx call your brot...