18. eighteen. 8teen.

On Saturday Jess will be 18.  Eighteen.  And snip goes another one of those damn apron strings.  Our excitement at it being on a Saturday and thus we spend all day together was shortlived as the 2 day Matric Focus programme of the school is Friday and Saturday and so she will spend 7am to 5pm on her 18th with her matric friends at Goodlands .... getting their heads, spirits, attitudes etc ready for Matric.  It is a wonderful initiative by the school and very good for them ..... but I would have loved to have her all to ourselves for the day. 

18.  Suddenly she could sign her own form for Saturday for the Adventure organisers, only had to co-sign if she was not 18 on the day of the outing.  18.  She can go for her driver's licence (that won't be happening in our house as driver's ed 101 is still very much in progress and the about to be 18 year old seems quite happy to be carted around by good 'ole mom).  18. she can legally drink alcohol (ok so I not exactly running up and down the passage shouting whoop whoop) but we raised her well and we know that she is sensible. 

But suddenly as January draws to an almost end in this important year for her, it seems as if a million memories a day are flooding my mind. I look at this poised and confident young lady when she leaves in the morning and then at night I lie on her bed chatting to her and I see she is still very much my little girl, nervous about Matric, nervous about the big changes next year ..... hanging on to one side of her life whilst stepping gingerly into the next side.  

But that is it hey .... that is what moms do .... we teach and raise and scold and encourage and explore and cry and share and learn and motivate and watch and celebrate and mourn and clap and cheer and attend and worry and then the hardest of all ..... we learn to slowly let go. 

But somehow I know that is still going to be a while. 

Till next time
c'est la vie xxx